Finding a community with his music

‘I grew up in a large family,” Mahmoud says of his youth. Growing up on the West Bank, in the Occupied Palestinian Territories, Mahmoud, had to adapt to the world around him, a world he could not see.

Without his eyesight, Mahmoud found he had an ear for the sounds of the world around him, and he also had time to think and dwell on questions and dilemmas he confronted, as well.

With his carefully attuned ear, Mahmoud pursued music at a school in Ramallah. As he advanced there, he decided to leave for studies in Egypt, learning to play the oud and then working as a musician.

As expected in his culture, Mahmoud married and with his wife, they had three children. But Mahmoud’s continued introspection also brought him grief. “I believe in people and in the power of the soul,” he says. But holding such individualistic views brought him in to conflict with the world around him.

“I was born blind. I always spoke openly about how I felt,” Mahmoud says. His views about social norms and constructs were not accepted by his family and the wider community. “As a result, I lost my family, friends and job. I lost everything,” Mahmoud explains.

Not only did his wife leave him, taking their children, but Mahmoud’s friends shunned him, and he lost his job. Mahmoud was no longer accepted in his tight-knit community, a community that he was particularly dependent due to his disability.

“As a blind man, I could have thought of my own interests and not talked to anyone. But I chose to be honest with myself and others, even though I paid a high price for it as I suffered great loneliness, contempt and finally was uprooted from my homeland,” the 46-year-old refugee says.

Eventually Mahmoud moved to Jordan and settled in Amman, where he worked as a peddler in the bazaars of the Jordanian capital. But even there, his views hindered his ability to live and integrate.

The ostracism Mahmoud faced caused him to decide to flee, once more. After many difficulties he managed to borrow money from some friends and to make his way to Kos island, in Greece, in the summer of 2018. After four months on the island, Mahmoud moved to Athens.

But Mahmoud’s travails were not over. All the years of suffering he had endured, the insults and bullying he had suffered had left deep psychological traumas. Mahmoud isolated himself, he was afraid and did not trust people. He chose to live alone, but fell victim to being exploited and tricked and thus ended up living in a dirty, dank basement in the center of Athens.

At the beginning of 2020, the UN Refugee Agency, UNHCR, its mental health partner, the Association for Regional Development and Mental Health (EPAPSY), about the difficult situation in which Mahmoud found himself.

EPAPSY operates a team of specially trained outreach workers who provide basic psychosocial support to asylum- seekers and refugees in their native mother tongue.

Hani, a refugee from Syria himself, is a Community Psychosocial Worker with EPAPSY providing refugee-to-refugee assistance. He was designated to buddy with Mahmoud to help the Palestinian get back on his feet and access psychosocial support.

“He shares his anxieties with me, I support him and I try to help him find a solution to the problems he faces,” Hani says. “I visit him once a week, and we talk on the phone almost every day. I accompany him to doctors and public services and help him with bureaucracy,”

EPAPSY’s refugee community support workers are supervised by trained psychologists and social workers and act as a bridge between the refugee community and mental health professionals. The programme is implemented with the co-financing support of the European Union.

Getting linked up with EPAPSY has been a life-saver for Mahmoud. “For me, Hani is a friend and a brother. In public services, people are usually polite, but I need help to fill out the forms and to communicate. Especially now with the pandemic, everything is more complex and difficult. Hani’s presence gives me courage. I feel like I have a friend who cares about me and tries to help me.”

A few months ago, Mahmoud was robbed. In addition to his meager savings, he lost documents proving that he was blind. With Hani by his side, Mahmoud visits the doctors who must certify that he is blind to obtain the disability allowance he is entitled.

After the process is completed, the 46-year-old man wants to become an active member of the “Lighthouse for the Blind” association, which he discovered through Hani, and to attend Greek and computer courses. Mahmoud also intends to join the association’s theatrical team and enroll in the gym.

Hani says, “Mahmoud begins to understand and speak Greek, but he lives alone, he is blind and he does not know Athens. So he needs someone by his side.”

Presently, Mahmoud’s priority remains his music, as he says, music is his life and he plays on the streets of Athens and meets up with his Greek friends, musicians, and plays in their homes.

About two months ago, Mahmoud managed to rent a small apartment in the city center and now looks to the future with more optimism and strength. He often visits a local coffee shop and begins to build a community with others who frequent the café.

“Athens is a big city with a lot of traffic. I do not think it is friendly to people with disabilities. It takes some time, but I get used to it. I am learning bus schedules and I am getting familiar with the streets around my house. I have counted the steps for the bakery and the supermarket. I’m finding my way,” Mahmoud declares.

“As It was difficult for me in Palestine, I went through difficult times in Greece too, as well, but I now live in a beautiful flat and in a short time I am going to have a stable income. I want to work as a musician and learn to play bouzouki and baglama. I also want to set up a home studio and write my own songs. I feel like I am starting a new life. I am determined, I will succeed,” Mahmoud declares.

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